So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I would ride that face into the sunset
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
