she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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