I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i drank out of a bidet.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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