Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
