: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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