How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
