there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
