I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
