and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
