Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
