in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
