we have officially lost it.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You may now shotgun with the bride
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
