Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
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