Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
