We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
