found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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