Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
