Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
