it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I have tasted many bathrooms
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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