some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
