i'm signing you up for texting rehab
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
