im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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