K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
