I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
