I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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