For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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