the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
