yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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