So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
