But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
