bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
