if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
