they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
