OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
well you can't waste a boner
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
