My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
