Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
