That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
