its not stalking. its research.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize