She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
