my sisters under your porch take her home
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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