But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
