My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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