It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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