Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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