i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
