erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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