Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Buhtt sex?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Randomize
