what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
