Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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