I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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